Christmas Recap

So here it is, the usual rundown of our holiday.

But this year it was anything but usual. We planned to have dinner on Christmas Eve at my parents house, and then host them for breakfast and present-opening with Tycho the next morning.

It was hectic getting things together on time, because this time of year my work schedule is insane, and our house cleaner no-showed the week of and everything was a disaster. We rescheduled with the agency for a cleaner to come on the evening of the 24th, theoretically to clean while we were at dinner. I felt terrible and planned to give her a gazillion dollar tip. Anyway, it's five pm, I'm wrapping presents before we leave for dinner, and Kyle is showing the new cleaner around the house and the power goes out. On Christmas Eve. ON CHRISTMAS EVE. So, we wait for a few, hoping it will come back on, but it looks like the whole block is out, stoplights and everything, and I have zero faith that anything will be done about it in a timely manner.

Be proud of me; I did not panic. We were in no condition to host in the morning, so I called my dad and told him we were moving Christmas there. In the dark (because obviously we don't own flashlights or candles), by the light of Kyle's phone, we packed up all the presents, some still not wrapped, all of our clothes and toiletries, and all of the groceries for breakfast the next morning, while Tycho was watching Daniel Tiger on my phone to keep him from panicking. And it all went... great? Besides Kyle getting the flu, which I suppose isn't so great, but we moved everything more or less without a hitch, and Tycho had a great Christmas.

"Santa" brought Tycho a train set for Christmas, and I didn't want to be overwhelmed with new toys, I asked friends and family to keep it to additions to his set (or, even better, donate to his school, but people like buying THINGS, it seems). I had less than high hopes, but mostly we got a lot of train stuff, and it all fits together in one box and we have both a happy baby and a happy mama.

Two and a half was just the perfect age for Christmas. He loved opening presents, but didn't go bananas and try to tear through everything and was pleasant and excited and adorable and it was wonderful. And I have graduated to full motherhood, because I did not care one bit what might have been under the tree for me because I was having so much fun experiencing everything through him.

Ink

I should probably post a bunch of things about the holidays and this year and whatever, before it is next year, but first, I got a tattoo!

The worst ever Christmas songs.

This year I am having a really hard time getting into the holiday spirit. And the sudden ubiquity of terrible Christmas music certainly isn't helping, either. So, here is a list of Christmas song that I hate, because I am a horrible grinchy asshole. I am also the only person in the world who doesn't like A Charlie Brown Christmas. Anyway, enjoy! Or, like, don't.

1.  Nat "King" Cole - All I Want For Christmas is My Two Front Teeth

This song is terrible in general, but it's even worse when sung by an adult male, who does in fact have all of his teeth, and has not even the faintest hint of a lisp. What the fuck is even the point?

2. Josh Groban - Silent Night

Or really anything by Josh Groban. Self importance and children's choirs. No thank you.

3. The Waitresses - Christmas Wrapping

OMG this song. It's not even a song. It's a boring first person narrative about a mediocre holiday season set to obnoxious background music. Eight holiday season in retail listening to this song multiple times daily has driven me to the brink of insanity.

4. Paul McCartney -  Wonderful Christmas Time

This song is just so incredibly stupid. Like I am losing IQ points right now listening to it.

4. Eartha Kitt - Santa Baby

Do I really need to explain why this song is terrible in every possible way? No no no no no.

5.  Marvin Gaye - Purple Snowflakes

What the fuck is this I don't even.

6. Jimmy Eat World - Last Christmas

I actually love the original Wham! version of this song with all of it's delightful cheesiness, but this is the worst cover ever. They don't add any personality to the song (and in fact sap out anything that was there in the first place), and DON'T SING ANY OF THE VERSES AND JUST REPEAT THE CHORUS OVER AND OVER AGAIN. I mean really. Were they too lazy to look up the lyrics and just recorded the parts they already knew? What in the actual fuck?

7. Sheryl Crow - The Christmas Song

Sheryl Crow? Really? Basically any version of this song by a mediocre pop star is just terrible. If you are not like, Bing Crosby or Michael Bublé, just don't even attempt it.

8. Barbra Streisand - Jingle Bells

Go home, Babs, you're drunk.

9. Sleigh Ride

Just any fucking version of this song. I'm still recovering from playing the saxophone part at the winter concert every single year in middle school band. God, this is just the worst.

10. Kay Starr - I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm (STUHR remix)

I don't even have a legitimate reason for hating this song, but it makes me irrationally angry every time I hear it. All day. Every day. Retail, man.

I feel better now that I've gotten that off my chest.

Trick or Treat

So I suppose I should post some of those pictures I referenced in my last post, huh?


We'll start with Halloween. This was our first year going trick-or-treating with Tycho, and also the first year that you can't just stuff him in a vaguely animal themed onesie and be done with it. Costume was going to be an issue, because he won't wear anything on his head, and 99% of costumes for toddlers involve some sort of hood or hat or head piece, so no. And I didn't want to dress him up as just some random thing, and instead something that he would actually be interested in. But the things he is interested in are trains, fish, and Lightning McQueen, and I'm sorry, but I'm just not creative enough for that. But wait... another thing he likes? Candy! Because candy!

When we were kids my sister was an m&m one year so my mom and I copied that costume (scaled down to Tycho size) pretty much exactly. And it was perfect. Nothing on his head, he could just wear his regular clothes underneath, so no worry about it being weather appropriate, and now that Halloween is over I need to remove the straps and he has two m&m pillows for his room, huzzah!

He was... okay... with trick or treating. We had a really rough day on Halloween so he was in a funky mood when we met friends to go door to door. He wasn't interested in wearing his costume and even though I had tried to explain the concept to him, he didn't really grasp what we were about to do But after a couple houses he figured it out pretty easy and it was all groovy. I don't think he ever once said trick-or-treat, and he insisted on being carried between houses for the entire hour we were out and my arms were sore for days, but he had a really good time, and it's going to be a happy memory. Babydude especially liked all the pumpkins. :)

The Best Thing

I have a lot of photo-heavy, low on content stuff to post what with Halloween and Trick or Treating and a trip to the zoo and his big boy haircut and our holiday family pictures, but that is all nothing compared to this.

Tycho talks.

Rocket science! You guys, I was so worried. My stomach was in knots for months as I was waiting and waiting and waiting, first for the language explosion that I was expecting that never came, and then to get him evaluated, and finally to actually get him placed into a program and start doing something. It was an emotional roller coaster, harder than I ever expected parenting to be, and a experience I never would have dreamed I would have.

The months ago Tycho could barely put two words together. He didn't have names for anyone or anything besides mama. He would lose old words every time a new word would appear. And we couldn't communicate effectively and we were all frustrated.

But now. Last night we were eating dinner and Tycho was sitting happily at the table say, "EAT FISH! EAT FISH! MORE FISH! PLEASE FISH!" while he ate. He uses rudimentary sentences. He has names now for Daddy and Arlo and his friend Selby at school and Lighting McQueen and Nemo and Dori and Thomas Train. He has new words every day. He supplies the word "feet" at the appropriate time when I sing him "Part of Your World" at bedtime. (And then he asks for "more song" and I sing him the reprise.) At our more recent trip to the zoo he said "lemur." He knows what a star fish is. I don't think I taught him that.

I am bursting with pride and happiness and gratitude and joy. Really and truly this is amazing and wonderful and I feel like we are able to know so much more of his delightful little personality now that he is able to share with us through his speech. When I think about where we are now and how far we've come I feel like a ball of energy and light. Euphoria. I can't even describe it.

We still have a ways to go but progress is being made and I couldn't be happier.

Hold

I suppose I should post something, at least, before it is next week, because for me, next week is the beginning of the end what with the working retail and holiday season and busybusybusy for the next forever or at least until January.

Things are mostly good, but tonight I am feeling especially emo about the baby thing, you know, that we don't have one yet, not even working on it at this point in time, and man, that sucks. I don't really have anything else to say about it. It sucks. I am sad. Pictures of other peoples babies make me weepy.

This is not going according to plan, my timeline is all blown to hell, we didn't want to space our children this far apart but too bad oh well. You cant schedule real life, I guess.

Insecurity

Most of the time I really do think I am a good mom.

Probably not the best mom of all time or anything. I lose patience, sometimes I yell, sometimes we watch Cars twice in a row because I'm exhausted and need a break, sometimes we go through the drive thru and eat french fries because why not. And none of those things make me a bad parent and I know that.

But sometimes I wonder if everything that's wrong is because of me. Not the things I did wrong, but the things I could have done that I didn't. That instead of throwing balls all the time always because that's what he wanted to do I could have been teaching him letters or colors or whatever else it is he is supposed to know by now that all the other kids somehow know by now that no one told me I was supposed to make sure he knew until he was already supposed to know. Why didn't I know? Why didn't I try to teach him even if I didn't? Does everything have to be educational?

WHY IS THIS PARENTING THING SO HARD?

It seriously leaves me feeling more vulnerable than I ever could have imagined being before.